I suppose every plan has some down time and every schedule has those pockets of inactivity interspersed with the times that everything happens at once, but this week turned out to be an empty, waiting one. I’ve had a few disappointments crop up, so some things are on hold or out altogether. For the girls it’s finals week in the trimester at school, so classes are wrapping up and closing down. Every single member of the family performed in a concert last week, and we have not yet begun the next cycle to get ready for coming concerts. It just happened that I had no rehearsals at all this week, after having to work things around to make them all happen in the weeks previous. One group I am not going to be able to participate in because the concert falls on the same day as my oldest daughter’s graduation ceremony, and the other two were canceled for out-of-town members or leaders. It wasn’t normal for this week to be idle.
Consequently, I feel in suspended animation. Waiting for the new, final trimester to begin, beginning to anticipate all of the looming preparations for graduation and the end of school, knowing that a dizzying pace will soon be upon us in the race to the last day as it always is. You would think it would be a welcome break; a rest. But I have been uneasy all week, not practicing like I should, not focused enough to write, not using the time to gear up and get ready for what is to come, just… waiting.
The seasons are turning, the clock changed, new things are coming. I want out of the cotton wool, out of the box.